Sunday, 24 September 2006

Deo-devils and Wax-virgins

Here in Finland there is a strange tendency to take things to the outrage in one way or another. To be subtly balancing on the edge is out of the question. For example, a woman dresses up to kill. Hair done beautifully, make up perfect and here comes the flaw in the picture: no perfume, no deodorant at all, just a pungent smell of sweat!

Then you get the bag-lady type who is not dressed up at all but has a nice scent of expensive perfume surrounding her like a cloud. By the way, I have heard about a man making his million by collecting refundable bottles in the dustbins. I have seen him in town and guess what, the smell is just awful! But, I have been told that when dresses up for going out, nobody recognizes him as the same guy with his suit on.

Then you get the teenagers that are always dressed to kill no matter what time of day it is and have used the whole bottle of perfume or used all the deodorant, a so called deo-devil. Also there is a tendency in the men from more southern areas of the world to exaggerate their use of perfume which is especially noticeable in elevators without any supplement of fresh air. And that’s when the migraine hits you.

Most people here are quite hairless, or at least so I have noticed watching people basking in the sun on the beaches during the summer. The ladies do not always shave their arm-pits, nor their bikini-areas. Guess this is a country full of wax-virgins. And deo-devils in one way or another, deodorant or no deodorant…

Saturday, 16 September 2006

Spend more than you can afford

Money, money, money must be funny, in the rich man’s world.
And if you’re not rich, you can borrow some money instantly and spend more than you can afford to!

First, get yourself some credit-cards and charge them full. Then move over to instant-mobile-phone-loans, just a phone-call away instantly into your account, when sitting in a bar and having used all your money and wanting to buy more drinks around.

Even better, take the instant loans in your parents’ names, their friends’ names, or your own friends’ names! You just have to have access to the right mobile-phone and know their social security-numbers and the finance-company deposits the money into your bank-account, instantly. This might sound like a nightmare but is actually happening everyday to some relatives and friends of the teenagers and young adults in this country.

Borrowing mummy’s, daddy’s or friends’ phones without them knowing and getting the money yourself with the loans to pay in their names.

Money, money, money, must be funny, until you get caught!

Money has become so over important in our society that you do just anything to get the right clothes and accessories. As this is not strictly speaking “stealing”, as robbing a bank might be, it probably feels much more easier to do. No pointing of guns at people.

To spend more now with too lightly granted credits, when you still have no job and have to get through your studies with high-rate mortgages and loans to pay? Not to mention getting married, buying a house, supporting a family and paying for their care and needs in the future…

Money makes the world go round, at least for the finance companies.

For the rest of us they can cause misery for years and years to come. Maybe we should just hope for a worldwide complete computer break-down so I can debit my credit-cards to my daddy’s account once again!

Thursday, 7 September 2006

Bringing up children conveniently

In the 60’s mummy was a housewife, in the 70’s it was “key-children” as neither of the parents were home, in the 80's some daddies were housewives and today “distant-up-bringing” of children is the issue.

Parents are now tracking their off-springs’ activities by their mobile-phones and the Internet. For toddlers and younger children you can log into the Homepage of your children’s kindergarten and see what they have been up to during the day. There you are presented with the photos the kindergarten-personnel have taken of their daily activities. Uploaded and updated on the Net several times a day.

And this is also so handy for all kinds of perverts!

Elder children you track down with a GPS-device, to know their exact whereabouts. You ring them once in a while to know everything is okay, tell them what to do and to ask them if they have done their home-work and heated up their TV-dinner in the microwave-oven. Not to mention the excellent use of Nanny-cams, then you really have control of what the kids were up to the when you were not at home. Well, at least you know what they did during your absence.

How is this for convenient for mummy and daddy? Now you don’t even have to afford to have a nanny or an au-pair to take care of your children, just check how they are doing on the Net, get home check the tapes taken by the Nanny-cam and tell the kids to brush their teeth and to go to bed! Nothing to worry about.

And all this to one day surprisingly to discover, that your child has got a driving license and borrowed your brand new BMW without your permission, crashing it under the influence of alcohol...

Thanking God nobody was killed!