Get to see your doctor

I really hand another subject in mind when beginning to blog today but today's subject just took overhand of my writing.

I had a call from a girl friend of mine about her husband who had noticed change in his behaviour of passing water as well as he's "the right age" and that's when you should see a doctor and so he did.

Or at least he tried to. He called his doctor to get an appointment but could not make an booking until the next day (which is today so I still don't know the outcome) as the booking system could not give any appointments until today, the beginning of the month. And as it is not considered as urgent, (which it might not be but still might as well be very urgent) he probably wouldn't get to see his doctor for at least a fortnight, he was told. But how on earth can you not book appointments for more than one single month at a time?

What kind of stone age booking system is that?!?

According to my experience, men tend to take their time to get an appointment to the doctor even when concerned with minor things as a common cold, and when they think it might be something wrong, as in a case as sensitive as their prostate, even more so.

Taking in concern the threshold for a man to call about his prostate and being ready and willing to go and have it handled, maybe even tampered with, his most private parts, well that's completely another thing than the annual visit for us women to our gynecologist, the old usual bore, so I think it was urgent and should have been taken more seriously.

This worries me quite a lot, not his prostate, but the way the health care act. First they want to educate us about what to look out for, then when you notice what you hopefully should not see, then you act as you have been told, and the result still is null and void. So in the end, what's the use? Given a little time you get used to the nuisance and forget about it.

And this is just one single case, how many are there out there?

Yes, you might save your life if you get to see the doctor but you might die trying to see him.

Confusing clips on TV

I can only assume that people's behaviour has been deteriorating here in Finland lately, that people are no longer as considerate, as they once used to.

This I can only assume as the TV intermissions for the moment, or commercial breaks, currently on one of the Finnish TV stations begin with a clip of an anonymous red figure doing something wrong or rather not nice to grey figures, and then the show continues after the intermission with the correct behaviour.

What has been quite puzzling is, that normally the figure behaving badly is the red one causing distress to the grey figure, or figures, but in some of these clips it is the other way around. Maybe the colours should be consistent to clarify what is really going on, as this is not a hard thing to correct using the computer technology the clips apparently have been made with.

Punk rocks

Some prejudices seem to become mellower by time.

Finally, the cult punk band the Sex Pistols got to hold their concert in Helsinki last Saturday. Last time they were scheduled in Helsinki for a concert in 1978, but it got postponed by three decades as the band was forbidden entry to the country. This as a result of protests from child protection and youth agencies as the Sex Pistols back then was considered as bad influence to the Finnish youth together with the band splitting up for a period of time.

This was the Sex Pistol’s third appearance in the country, and maybe there are not as many fans dressed up in the proper punk manner as in the good old days, as most of them must be at least my age, and many things change in time, and three decades is a loong time.

Ah, sweet youth of mine, brings back memories.

Boy killed by family dog

Dogs have recently been well discussed in this country, especially Rotweilers.

Last Saturday a ten year old boy was killed in southern Finland when attacked by at least by one of the family’s two dogs, Rotweilers, in their own home yard. There were no eyewitnesses to the incident and the boy died on the spot due to the inflicted injuries and the two dogs were later on put down by the vet. Neither one of the two dogs had previously shown any behaviour out of the ordinary nor do the police have any suspicions of the incident having been set up.

Rotweilers are prohibited in many countries as they are considered as hard to cope with and being “one man’s dogs”. More commonly Rotweilers are bread as guarding dogs and sometimes even brought up as fighting dogs. Here in Finland the breeder's association has taken care to breed a more social type of dog, and a Rotweiler expert at the Veterinarian institute of the Helsinki University considers this attack as quite unusual for Finnish Rotweilers.

Who is to say why this sad incident took place, whether the boy made something that caused the dogs to attack him or the dogs just flipped. One thing is for sure, no matter how friendly a dog normally is, it still is an animal that is unpredictable. Guess that is how life is, things happen and not always nice things, unfortunately.

An acquaintance had a friendly, very sociable little dog when the offspring was small; unfortunately I have no idea of the breed but one of these nowadays so popular lap-dog breeds it was. He was always prancing around, playing with the kids and wagging his tail until one day out of the blue he just snapped and bit one of the toddlers in the face. Must have been the size that was convenient, and unfortunately it was my offspring he attacked and was scarred for life. Anyway, as I was standing right next to the dog and child when it happened I can vouch there was nothing preceding that could have caused the attack. Still it happened. Our family dog instead, a sturdy Basset-hound girl now long ago dead, she only used to growl low, stand up and leave the scene when the offspring got too friendly with her as she was napping the day away.

Still, she did not bite, she never used to, and I always said she hasn’t bitten anyone until this day but you never can be sure. And puppies and kittens are always on the go with grinding their teeth on everything and anything, no matter how much you try to make them stop. The itch must be terrifying.

Money for the poor

After the recent water crisis in the town of Nokia where thousands became ill The Ministry of Social Affairs and Health is requiring all municipalities in Finland to thoroughly check their water treatment systems’ plumbing by march in order to avoid such disasters in the future. The town’s sewage water got mixed into the cleaned tap water by a vault that was not even thought to exist between the clean drinking water pipes and the waste water.

The cleaning up of the Nokia’s water system is still going on and many citizens have now claimed compensation from the town. A couple of deaths occurring at the time of the water contamination are to be scrutinized just to be on the safe side to check whether the sewage water might have caused the deaths or not.

There is said to be 130.000 poor families in Finland and I have wondered what that really means, who is counting it and how it is done. Does that mean that you are living on social welfare as you are below the existential minimum of means for daily survival or how is it decided? Sounds like an awful lot, to me at least, in a country that is proud to call itself a welfare state.

Anyway, as there is a charity fund raising every Xmas and it ends on Xmas Eve I have been wondering how the money will get to the needing in time to celebrate the holidays as it is said, or is a part saved from the previous year to the next year? The money apparently goes to the needing families as gift vouchers which I think is good, at least then you know it goes to what is was designated for, food and not booze from the liquor store.

Which is the main reason I never give away money to beggars, I could buy a Big Mac or something similar instead but those offers have so far always been turned down, and quite in a rude way as well.

The amount of beggars, and here I mean foreign and not the usual winos and homeless, has increased in Finland and there are talks about abolishing begging in the capital region. Well, as I have already noticed, begging is not very successful in this country to the great disappointment of many foreign beggars standing around in corners but why only prohibit begging in the capital region, shy not in the whole country when you’re at it? Makes it easily comprehensive, one general rule for the whole country.

Paternal leave

After a legislative change by the beginning of 2007 more fathers here in Finland are encouraged to stay home when children are born into families.

In Finland there apparently is a four month maternal leave followed by parental leave that can be used either by the mother of the child or the father, or it can even be shared by both. Still not many men take advantage of this great opportunity with this paternal leave to spend time with their new born children, many claiming it being a matter of money and missed career opportunities and only one in ten fathers make use of this unique opportunity, which I think is really sad.

Well, outcome in hand, I can now say that my father was very keen on his career when we were young, my sister and I, at least we had the opportunity of out mother staying home with us so we had at least one parent at home when small. When we grew older and both in out time began school our mother returned to the working life first as part time, to still be able to be there for us when needed. But we never saw our father, he was busy making a career, and my, so he did!

My sister and I grew up, got married and had children of our won and our parents divorced our father getting remarried not too long after having new children with his new, much younger wife. This means I have sisters and brothers who actually are younger than my offspring. My offspring has aunts and uncles that are younger than they are. This also means I am older than my father’s new wife as well.

My father now has told me regrets the time he lost when we were children my sister and I, that he was never there for us then and that he will try to better this time, but as they say, it is hard to teach old dogs any tricks. They have already got their own peculiar ways and one thing you can sadly enough never get back is time, nor lost chances.

They are gone for ever, and never to come back!

So if anyone listens to me, take the paternity leave if given the chance and spend it with your offspring, it is way too late when they get their driver’s licenses and ask to borrow your new car!

Happy New Year!

The New Year 2008 brings with it many changes in legislation and regulations here in Finland, as well as the normal prices annual increases.

Outdoor advertising of alcoholic drinks such like "happy hour" will be prohibited, and bulk discounts on alcoholic beverages is to disappear as well as TV commercials for alcohol are now banned between 7.00 am and 8.00 pm, and alcohol commercials won’t be allowed in cinemas when the film is allowed for under 18 olds.

There will also be a legislative reform in order to reduce the number of part time work contracts for employments longer than one month. The employees must now be informed of the basis for their part time contracts, receive annual vacation and a notice period that is consistent with the duration of their work contract.

Also a reform governing the protection of children will take place for better protection of the minor’s interests and to ensure that both children and their families have access to necessary support, to improve cooperation with officials and enable timely interventions if needed.

A raise is awaited in the price of petrol by 5 cents per litre, and diesel by 5,5 cents and Bus tickets will to rise by 5.2 percent and long-distance train tickets costing an average of 3% more. The postage is also going up and stamps will cost 7 percent unless for letters weighing less than 50 grams.

And to the joy of anyone with a mortgage, the interest rates are also set to go up.

Water and power

Finally the inhabitants of the Finnish town Nokia can begin to make use of their tap water after sewage had leaked into the local water supply one week ago.

The municipal tap water quality is beginning to improve, and it can now be used once for drinking and cooking if it is for at least five minutes. The tap water is now safe to be used for in washing machines and dish washers and to shower in. hand washing is still recommended to be carried out in boiled water. On Monday there will be an update on water quality and usage recommendations from authorities and the current recommendations apply for the almost entire town Nokia except fro some small parts.

I have hard to imagine how to cope for more than a week without any tap water, being as preoccupied in my own thoughts as I sometimes tend to be. I wonder how many times I would have washed my hands without thinking about it, made some coffee in the percolator, washed some dishes or run a washing machine.

It is the same with electricity, when you have none you can only come to think of a thing that needs it, like watching TV, making some coffee, washing something or using some other kitchen appliance. What would the modern man do if cut off from both clean, running water and electricity at the same time?

Read a book in candle light maybe…as working with photography digitally has its' downsides when no power supply at hand.

Average Finnish citizen

The average Finnish man is 39 years old, he marries when he is 32 years old, earns 2300 Euros per month and he has beer about once a week whilst the average Finnish woman is 42 years old , she marries at 32, has 1,8 children. She earns an average of 2000 Euros a month and has beer less often the average Finnish man and both are overweight.

Anyway, now most of my time goes for getting our turkey in order for tomorrow’s celebrations of the Finnish Independence Day.

Wonder what weather it will celebrated in, I have heard from someone old enough that was there the first time that the weather was ever so cold. And tomorrow there will be the traditional reception at the President’s residence, more commonly referred to as “the Castle”, where Finnish citizens that have made their name know in one way or other are invited to. Women usually spend a fortune in having a new gown sewn, professional make-up done and hair done by a professional as the whole event is televised from the first entry of the guest until the last ones arrives in a before hand determined order. The show is broadcasted on one channel in Swedish and a second one in Finnish. Some guests are interviewed after having greeted the President Halonen and her husband. Some of the after parties are also seen so we all will know how the rich and famous look on this day.

When I first arrived in Finland there was only coffee, tea and soft drinks served but it seems now that wine has been introduced to celebrations to the festivities as well.

And if you did not receive an invitation, maybe you are lucky next year to receive one as they are posted well in advance during the fall.

Beaujolais Nouveau 2007

The strangest thing happened today I was actually ten minutes too early for the Alko shop to open but at least I did know to get to the right one!

The same one will be kept open today and the rest of this week for that matter which might be good to know if any unexpected overnight guest surprises us, even if I doubt that.

Anyway, Alko did not open until 12.30 pm differing from the usual 9 am with the strike of the employees beginning this morning to end on Saturday, and so I had to stay in line outside the shop in question with about three dozen people for about ten minutes. In this particular shop the staff consisting of the supervisors of several other shops in the near by area had apparent difficulties in getting the lights on and the cashier’s into working properly and they opened three minutes past their opening hours. During this awaiting the comments in the queue were quite harsh.

There were no happy faces and nobody was smiling or laughing, this was serious matter!

Someone said in honest between his firmly clenched teeth that if he got into the shop he would no go out without having purchased all he could carry and on his credit card. Severe looks and growling sounds were thrown at the passers by as they disturbed the queue that had formed waiting for the shop to open. I was about the tenth to get into the store and was second in line to get out as the Beaujolais Nouveau I was there to get was right in front of me when entering. It took me about 30 seconds to get in and out of there and get in line for the check out.

One strange Finnish custom is to not keep the receipt, and I have been wondering about that as you can never prove that you bought anything, as even the wine or liquor bottles might be deficit.

Anyway, the cashier was quite happy with punching in the two very first bottles of this year’s Beaujolais Nouveau. After that it was time for mum to go and buy some new books for the offspring to use in high-school and get home early enough in order to get everything in order for the often not until nocturnally ending tasting of the wine. Fortunately this is the one day in the year the offspring has learned there is no use to talking sense to dear old mum. She is probably too far into tasting the wine with her friends, and you'd better be quiet and safe out of sight or otherwise you'll be asked unwanted questions if not by her then her friends.

One thing, I miss the popping of the corks like on the bottles of last year.

I know, I know, the screw tops are much better to keep the wine in perfect order, but still the popping of the cork was an enjoyable thing to do. Kind of made it more festive.

Cake from hell

Birthdays are always nice, and I am especially fond of little children’s birthdays.

The small children show their feelings with absolute honestly in opposition of grown-ups who always pretend liking their presents instead of stating their opinions. Even when you are asking and saying you can get it changed into something else they still pretend to like something that you obviously can see was no to their liking in order to be polite. Where as a little child really cares about the gifts and begins to play with them at once, ignoring the rest of the presents is reluctantly persuaded by its' mother into taking part in opening of the rest of the presents.

Anyway, here we come to the cake part. I am very fond of cooking and I enjoy my fair share of baking as well but I am not too fond of eating cakes and avoid them. And avoiding eating them has become an art form for me which most hostesses are completely aware of in advance and they do not insist on me having any cake. Well so did this hostess as well, and she did not insist on me having cake, she was loudly telling me to eat it in front of all the other guests. Afterwards I kept wondering about why she did it, as she has been aware of my eating customs for years and came to the conclusion that she was making it a show.

The occasion itself was quite dull with all the respective grandparents present and a handful of friends to the family and in my mind I got stuck on the paternal grandfather having repeatedly been on about how “only stupid people get fat”, that it is only “a matter eating too much with too little exercise” and with this referring to his daughter in law who has just quit breastfeeding the younger one a while ago after having had two children with only one year in between.

When asking about it on the phone she told me her father in law has been nagging her about her weight ever since she got pregnant with her first child and nobody any longer pretends to hear his remarks on the subject and that she snaps back at him when given the occasion. Hope she does not get into baking a special cake for just her father in law…

Wishing for a headache

They say that drinking habits are getting more and more unified in all of EU. What does this mean then? The rest of Europe is following in the foot-steps of the Nordic countries, the ancestors of the heavy drinking Vikings, getting pissed every weekend? Or do they try to convince us that the inhabitants of the Nordic countries finally learned how to drink socially?!?

Anyway I have a bad migraine and can not even imagine drinking any alcohol for a hundreds years! That is until this migraine loosens the vice it has got on the veins in my brain and subdues into a normal day after headache. Right now I would welcome an ordinary headache with open arms together with a hang over I had caused drinking some good red wine instead of this instead of this sickening feeling accompanied by thought on how to get my hands on a gun to end my misery. If you have no migraine then you do not know what pain is. And there is no “No pain, no gain” it means nothing as nothing comes out of this.

New acquaintances

According to research done by one of the major TV-stations here in Finland the Finns are not prepared to make any changes in lifestyle to avoid climate change, which means bad news for our fishing friend, shorter winters to go ice fishing. Well, our mad fisherman has now persuaded my husband into trying fishing during the summer, so guess our cats will be kept happy all summer long.

One thing really comes in mind here, even with all the jokes about the Finnish men considering sausages and hot dogs being vegetables, many of them actually like fish!

Not just fishing, the hunting and catching part of it, but they really enjoy eating it too. Well, fish is more considered to be women’s food where I come from, so this was a surprising revelation for me. I really just hope that it is not contagious, this ice fishing all winter long.

It is always nice to meet some Finnish friends, like our friend that came for dinner yesterday; you get to learn new things about this country and the people living in it. People coming from different counties actually do behave kind of like their stereotypes, and this guest was the silent type. The silence in-between was not an awkward one, but it still bothered me as I was not used to it as it was the first time I met this colleague of my husbands.

One funny story though, our guest just having read a book about the late war hero and famous general of Finland, told us a story about when the late general was visiting the eastern neighbour, again, this time invited, after the war. He was invited to see a ballet and was asked by some journalist what he thought of ballet, he answered by: “It is so nice to see our former enemies on their toes once again.”

Anyway, the yesterday served meal consisting of simple steaks, pommes gratin and rhubarb pie were a success, the off-spring behaving impeccably during the meal, being polite to our guest with the result of the guest promising to be back, and this was no “just being polite” compulsory saying, he really meant it.

Here the Finns rather not say anything instead of just say something to be polite.

And he will be back again given the chance, maybe not a single anymore next time.

And I will have a new acquaintance to make one day to look forward to.

Lost friendship

Friendship is a strange thing, it can stay strong if you work on it or you just leave it and it withers and dies.

There are different types of friendships, friends that you get along with your social status, they come with the family you were born in and who they used to socialize with. Very few friends are truly chosen by our selves and most of our friends come along with something else, there are classmates and friends you had in school, the ones you studied along with to get a profession and your colleagues, the ones you work with and your former colleagues.

Then there are the friends of your spouse, his fellow students, colleagues from work and the clubs you socialize in, the parents from your children’s school, your neighbours and so on.

I have moved around quite a lot during my life time, so my closest friends were the ones that normally lived the farthest away. They seemed to always live elsewhere than where I was living, but they always stayed closest to my heart. Meeting them has always been like just seeing them yesterday and catching up with news has been great fun.

Some friends I am sad to have lost contact with during the years, and some I could not care less about, life being an ever changing element and us having to adapt with it to all its’ changes. We sometimes loose what is essential in our relationships and it all becomes so material and the essence, or the soul, of the friendship is lost.

I am especially sad about one friendship gone sour, having been friends for over 25 years and been the closest you can get, sometimes even closer than my proper sister. It really hurts, and I do feel let down, I miss our friendship as it used to be. I ask myself if it ever was what I thought it was, if it all was pretending from the beginning. It is not that we have lost contact completely, it is not just worth the while anymore, just “hello, nice weather today” things that I do not care much for and just keeping in touch out of an old habit.

I need more substance to a friendship than that. Friendship is about caring and giving, about listening when needed to and just being there…

We have a saying in our family, and that is “better guests” and this goes for “better friends” as well, I have noticed.
The “better guests” are the ones you invite out of etiquette because you have to, because they expect you to invite them as you are frequently invited to their homes and they are most probable to stay out of contact when you really need a friend or something bad happens to you. Like loosing your job or becoming ill.

Your real friends might not have a fancy car, or have well paid job, but still they are your friends, you might have known them since your early childhood, or pre-school years and they know who you really are. They do not even see the façade you are trying to put up with your “social” friends. Life is so short, and our time is limited, and we waste most of it making it more hectic than it need to be, tending to forget the most important and precious things in our lives after our own well-being, our families and our friends…

Black Xmas

Sounds a bit ominous, like the black plague or something but that is the term for no snow-Xmas here in Finland. And that it was in most parts of the country except for way up north. It must then be good for all the homeless then, as it is not as cold as normally. I think it is strange that there actually are people with no homes here in this country, with the weather we normally have in the winter. For 100 years now the Xmas cauldron has been on the streets in this country to collect money during the week before Xmas for people without the means to have a Xmas, and I think it is a disgrace that it still is needed as much today as it was a century ago! I do not understand this talk about Finland as a state of welfare and social security not at Xmas or any other day! Several hundred people are sleeping outdoors as they have nowhere to stay. Maybe this should be the meaning of black Xmas?

Anyway, if something unexpected happened to you like losing your job or becoming ill, then it might take up to 3 months before you start receiving any money, so where do you go then?!? You might end up on the street yourself.

No food, no money for the rent, nowhere to store your things, you just loose everything! And the Finnish Lutheran mind is taught to cope on its’ own, without any help. So even if you would be eligible for social benefits to get by economically so many people do just struggle by, day by day.

Thank God I have a kettle and it is on. And there will soon be a nice cup of tea for me!

Xmas cards

Every year 250000 cards are destroyed by the postal authorities due to wrong or incomplete addresses. They say that a little more attention is paid to tracing the recipient of other consignments such as letters and parcels.

Sad but true that your Xmas card might not arrive to the recipient if you do not have the right the postal code. And on top of that, if you have a common name, and the street address exist in many towns then you might not get all the cards sent to you. But, if you do have an unusual name, as a friend of mine, who received a Xmas card from abroad with just his Surname and the country. The card was delivered just in time before Xmas too, even though it must’ve been sent very late. That must be a Xmas miracle!

No more holy Finnish trinity

In the old farming community about a century ago there used to be a “holy trinity" in every village here in Finland that everyone had to obey.

It consisted of the school-teacher, the doctor and the priest and they were the wisest and wealthiest and no one had any means to oppose them as they usually also were the village elders. The Trinity taught everyone to obey without any objections.

Now, how is this today?

Older people still respect “the trinity” and do not express their differing opinion in front of them, they do talk behind their backs though. Younger people are more straightforward and tell what they think. So the teachers are in trouble as the youngsters of today are not as respectful as they were less than a century ago. It is now the pupils hitting the teacher instead of the other way as it used to.

The Lutheran priests are celebrating mass on Sundays in empty churches, as the young ones here in Finland begin to practise the much more freer New Age and pagan religions The same as they recently have begun to do in so many other Western countries. The church has nothing to offer people anymore, too stiff and rigid.

Even the doctors have less influence than before and they can be wrong too, and they even admit being wrong sometimes. I have few a couple of them, but some doctors still think they are next to God.

I just came from an appointment with a very rude doctor who told me off in a very rude way for no reason at all. I can't see why asking a perfectly relevant question to the issue at hand to triggered that abusive answer. It must have been her time of the month, and it is so sad to always have to explain female reactions with the same answer.

Well, she would not have been a waitress for very long. Not even a cheap and sleazy hamburger-bar, I tell you, not with her attitude!

Anyway, I'm out of there, problem solved, the sun is shining, and I am enjoying a nice cup of hot tea.
So life goes on and tomorrow is another day.

We must do lunch one day!

Isn’t that the most convenient and nice little phrase to say just being polite and without meaning it.
“We must do lunch”, or “Call me next week”!

But just saying that without meaning it can cause you problems here in Finland. People here take your word for more seriously than just politeness. Saying a courteous non-committal “we must do lunch” the Finns really respect that you have made a promise to have lunch and they expect you to have the lunch with them!

So keep in mind what you say and how you say it, and also be in time for your lunches.

Invitations by texting

The weather has been really nice this weekend. It has not been too cold for any outdoor-sports but I have stayed indoors anyway, cuddled up in my bed reading a good book and a nice cup of tea feeling lazy. I am glad there are no dinner-parties needing to attend to neither to host any.

Just in two weeks time there is an occasion I have to host, a birthday-party, so am doing some planning already. The invitations were already sent but I have not yet got their answers back and they are not due until next Sunday at latest by either e-mail or SMS or text-message.

Text-messaging is quite handy in these matters, absolutely ghastly impersonal, but still it is in the persons hand and can't be forgotten about in the same way as an invitation card could get misplaced.

I actually made the invitations by phone, but sent a reminder about it by e-mail as this is more a casual gathering and not THE social event of the year.

As rest of Europe has become more snow that usual, at the same time we have just had our even every year share of it, even though they say it is more wintry now than usually this year of spring, cause it is spring here even as you can't see it yet.